I recently had a few job opportunities come my way. I’ve been home full-time, working part-time, most of the past 3 and ½ years. When trying to figure out what I wanted to do I discovered that my goals and aspirations in life have change quite a bit since becoming a Mom.
Don’t misunderstand this statement as me saying I no longer have dreams for myself. I do, I have many dreams and things I would like to do and achieve. But when analyzing and soul-searching the lifelong question, “what do I want to do when I grow up,” everything seems different because my life is no longer just about me; or even just my husband and I. My choices now strongly take into consideration what is best for my family? Not just from a financial stand point, but also well-being.
I have years of successful sales experience. My last few years in the work world I was encouraged to try to move into a Field Sales position and that had always been my plan. I much prefer working with customers face to face, but traveling for days at a time, regularly, that just didn’t sound appealing anymore knowing my husband and I wanted to start a family.
I always felt a sense of accomplishment based on my level of success in my career. I think that is very common in our society these days. So once I started staying home I think I went through a bit of an identity crisis, LOL! Who had I become? The answer was just a Mom, and was that enough? For a long time I didn’t think it was because I felt like I have skills, potential, whatever you would like to call it, and I wasn’t using those things to benefit my family. I used to focus on what I did best, or could do the best, to make the most money; which in turn I felt was best for my family. I’m have to be honest! I wasn’t really focusing on what I had a true passion and interest in doing with my life. I felt like financial stability was going to help my family; especially after living paycheck to paycheck for years after deciding to stay home. I envisioned myself going back into a sales career, moving up, maybe striving for management. It’s what I had done, and pretty well!
I remember before having children I told someone my dream job was to be a personal trainer. I love fitness, being active, and pushing myself to continue to do new things; even as I get older. Well, my husband laughed at this statement one time! I asked him why and he said, “Because you say it’s your “dream job” like it’s something that would be hard for you to accomplish. In reality you could quit your job and change careers very easily!” He was right. My hold up was that a passion job wasn’t as lucrative a sales career, and that just didn’t seem like a smart decision. But the saying, “The best things in life are free,” is so true! I’ve been much happier being home and dealing with limited funds. Raising my children and trying to make the best of these years when they are young. So being a Mom has changed me, and changed my goals in life because making sure I can create the best family life for them is my most important goal.
Currently my husband’s job has become very demanding. It’s a good thing! He has a great job but he works long hours and has been traveling recently. When thinking to myself what kind of life do I want for my family and what do I actually WANT to do with my life. The answer is, I want to be there for my family, both in actual time AND I want to be present. Sales, though a great career, is also stressful and can require extra hours. I envisioned myself getting stressed out, overwhelmed and not being the person I needed to be for my family back in that career. My husband’s job is going to continue to be demanding and I don’t want my kids to spend hours at a daycare and then come home to a rushed couple hours with stressed out parents. I want to give them what I can, and that is time, support and a sane happy Mom!
For now, I’m going to focus on my family and just be a Mom. After thinking about career options personal training would be a great fit in my life going forward. It can be part-time, flexible with scheduling and is something I would absolutely LOVE! So here’s to the future and all of its possibilities!!
(Am I alone in this? Have you other Moms out there experienced a whole new perspective that changed your goals and dreams for yourself? I would love to know how motherhood has changed you?)
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